Silly League
by Windrises
Summary: A parody of the Justice League film. Batman and his "sidekicks" team up to stop Steppenwolf.


Note: Justice League and DC are not owned and created by me. This story is dedicated to Adam West.

Superman had been gone for months. People were getting scared. Even Batman pretended to miss Superman. Batman entered the bat cave and said "I think it's time to start the Justice League."

Alfred Pennyworth asked "Is there a major threat coming?"

Batman replied "Actually I just want to hang around some weak super heroes so I look cooler by comparison. The world started having doubts about me after I tried to destroy Superman so I need to manipulate them into being a fan of me agin."

Alfred sarcastically replied "How noble."

Meanwhile Steppenwolf and his sidekicks were returning to Earth. Steppenwolf said "I failed to take over the world last time, but this time I won't lose. People think I was born to sing, but I was actually born to rule the world. Soon the world will be gone. Ha, ha, ha!"

Bruce Wayne met up with Wonder Woman. Bruce said "I need you to be a part of my team."

Wonder Woman asked "Why?"

Bruce replied "Because your film is the only recent DC film that people like. I need your help which is rare for me to say, because usually I'm cool enough to never need help. I'm like so amazingly cool that it's impossible to be cooler than me. Will you join my silly league?"

Wonder Woman said "Okay."

Alfred came by and said "I'm sorry to interrupt your bragging Bruce, but I heard that there's a villain called Steppenwolf that's taking over the world."

Bruce said "I didn't know a music band could be that evil."

Alfred replied "It's not a music band. Steppenwolf is a classic DC villain."

Bruce stated "I've never heard of him."

Alfred said "He's the uncle of Darkseid."

Bruce replied "I know all about Darkseid, but I don't know this stepping on wolfs thing."

Alfred said "He's not 1 of DC's most popular villains."

Bruce said "Oh. It seems like I'll have to quickly get the other team members."

Bruce drove to the ocean to find Aquaman. Bruce said "I need to talk to you Water Dude."

Aquaman asked "What do you want bro?"

Bruce replied "The world is in danger. A guy who steps on wolfs is trying to take over the world. I'm assembling a team of goofballs like you to help you."

Aquaman said "I'm not going to help you."

Bruce said "I'm a millionaire so I can pay you well if you help me save the world."

Aquaman thought about it and said "Okay."

Bruce drove to the Flash's house. Bruce said "Hi Flash."

The Flash asked "What do you want Mr. Wayne?"

Bruce said "I'm Batman. I need you to join my silly friends team."

The Flash replied "Okay. That seems like fun. Woo hoo."

Bruce whispered "Weirdo."

The Flash said "I can run super fast."

Bruce said "It seems like you would useful in a super race instead of saving the world. Do you have any enemies?"

The Flash replied "I fight a ice guy called Captain Cold."

Bruce said "Well I do really like fighting ice themed criminals."

Bruce went back to his hideout and said "I got 3 mildly cool super heroes to join my team. Who's the last super hero I need?"

Alfred replied "Cyborg."

Bruce asked "What about Green Lantern?"

Alfred replied "He's oddly not in this film."

Bruce broke into Cyborg's house and started stealing Cyborg's sodas.

Cyborg asked "What's going on dude?"

Bruce said "Join my team of super heroes."

Cyborg said "I don't want to."

Bruce angrily replied "If you don't join the team I'll add you to my list of rivals."

Cyborg replied "Okay Mr. Calm."

Bruce got on his Batman costume and met up with the other super heroes. Batman said "Thank you for agreeing to be my new sidekicks."

Aquaman asked "Are we sidekicks?"

Batman replied "Yeah."

Wonder Woman said "We're teammates, not sidekicks."

Batman said "I've had multiple shows and films and you 4 have barely had anything. You're lucky that you're even in this film."

Aquaman whispered "Batman's rude."

The Flash whispered "Yeah."

Batman said "Be quiet servants. Anyways lets go fight Steppenwolf."

Cyborg asked "Do you have a plan?"

Batman replied "Of course. We go to where Steppenwolf is and beat him up."

Cyborg said "That seems like a very simple plan."

Batman replied "Shut up."

Aquaman whispered "Rude Batman." Batman slapped Aquaman.

The Flash whispered "Harsh Batman." Batman slapped the Flash.

Aquaman said "If you keep being a wise guy I'll throw water at you."

Batman said "You have more potential to be a water boy than a super hero."

Aquaman whispered "Accurate, but rude." Batman kicked Aquaman and threw him around.

The Flash whispered "Batman's crazy." Batman punched the Flash across the room. It took a day for Aquaman and the Flash to recover so Batman goofed off for a day.

Steppenwolf was busy stealing the Mother Boxes to help him take over the world. He said "There are 3 boxes and I have 2 so I'm close to winning."

Batman said "You may be close to winning, but you're also close to losing."

Steppenwolf looked at the super heroes and asked "Who are these weird looking fools?"

Batman replied "I'm Batman and these are my servants um sidekicks."

Steppenwolf said "You super powered friends better go away before I crush you."

Batman proudly replied "I'm way more awesome than you. In fact I could probably defeat you without much help." Steppenwolf used his ax to hit Batman. Batman passed out.

Wonder Woman said "I'll stop you."

Steppenwolf replied "Yeah right you immodestly dressed fool." Steppenwolf battled Wonder Woman, but the Flash tripped and knocked Wonder Woman to the ground. Steppenwolf used his ax to beat up both of them.

Cyborg blasted Steppenwolf. Steppenwolf said "Stop annoying me you teen titan." Steppenwolf threw Cyborg across the room.

Steppenwolf said "It appears that I've won this fight."

Aquaman proudly said "Don't forget about me."

Steppenwolf said "Ah. The super hero that fans love to make fun of."

Aquaman replied "I'm actually super awesome bro. I have so many useful ocean powers."

Steppenwolf said "Your water powers may be useful when you're fighting Black Manta, but are they helpful at all while we're far away from the ocean?"

Aquaman thought about it and said "I don't know what I can do here." Aquaman nervously danced.

Steppenwolf asked "Why are you dancing?"

Aquaman replied "I thought my high quality dance moves would convince you to stop being evil."

Steppenwolf said "You ironically impressed me by being the king of super dorks." Steppenwolf pushed Aquaman away.

After losing the fight Batman and the other super heroes went back to their hideout. Bruce said "We messed up."

The Flash smiled and said "We did a good job at losing."

Cyborg replied "Steppenwolf made us look like weaklings and fools."

Aquaman said "At least I'm a good dancer."

Wonder Woman said "We need to handle things differently."

Bruce replied "No need to worry. I got a great plan."

Aquaman said "I doubt that. I hope this plan involves water and high quality dancing."

Bruce stated "We're not cool enough to save the world. We need another super hero. Lets bring Superman back."

Cyborg asked "How could we do that?"

Bruce replied "Don't worry. I have a great plan." Bruce had the other super heroes dig up Superman's body. Bruce threw a bat-life changer at Superman.

Aquaman said "It seems like you have a gadget for everything."

Batman proudly replied "I'm perfection."

Superman woke up and looked mad.

The Flash asked "Why does he seem mad?"

Batman replied "It's probably because he read the score that Batman V Superman got on Rotten Tomatoes."

Superman angrily stared at Batman. Superman said "You were foolish enough to think I was a villain. You even tried to destroy me. Plus you waited until like half of the film for me to show up."

Batman said "That's Doomsday's fault."

Superman angrily replied "You always blame other people for your own problems. I'm sick of your self centered nonsense." Superman started choking Batman. Lois Lane showed up. Superman smiled and let go of Batman. Superman gently picked up Lois and flew away.

Batman said "I failed again."

While the super heroes were distracted Steppenwolf grabbed the 3rd Mother Box. Steppenwolf said "Soon I'll have the whole world. Then Darkseid will finally promote me. Ha, ha, ha!"

Batman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, the Flash, and Cyborg started planning their next fight against Steppenwolf.

Alfred asked "Where's Superman?"

Batman replied "I messed things up with him."

Alfred sarcastically said "This sure is a surprise."

Meanwhile Superman was standing in a field. Superman looked somewhat nervous.

Lois asked "What's wrong sweetie?"

Superman replied "My actor has a mustache. If the CGI doesn't hide that well enough I'll look like Cesar Romero's Joker."

Lois said "You look cute with a mustache."

Superman said "I'm hoping that there isn't a weird villain trying to take over the world."

Lois replied "There is. Bruce told me it's some guy who steps on wolfs."

Superman said "Despite how weird that sounds I'll take care of it."

Meanwhile Batman and his "sidekicks" found some of Steppenwolf's sidekicks and started attacking them. Batman wasn't able to do much damage to Steppenwolf's team so he stood around while the others worked hard fighting the enemies. Aquaman decided to stand around too. Aquaman whispered to Batman "Since there isn't a ocean nearby I can't do anything."

Batman whispered "I'm mostly good at fighting crazy people."

Batman, Wonder Woman, Aquaman, the Flash, and Cyborg found Steppenwolf.

Batman said "We lost last time, but we plan on changing our reputation this time."

Aquaman replied "You better watch for our super heroic antics and high quality dancing."

Steppenwolf said "Ah. The defenders of fools. You 5 lost last time."

Superman entered and said "Things will be harder for you this time."

Aquaman said "Superman returned just like he did in 2006."

Steppenwolf said "I thought you got killed."

Batman replied "They wouldn't make a Justice League without Superman unless I made it."

Steppenwolf kicked Batman and the others away. Steppenwolf said "Superman your teammates are pathetic. This fight will be between you and me and I think I'll prove how cool I really am."

Superman replied "Yeah right."

Steppenwolf punched Superman a few times, but Superman's punches were much more impressive. Steppenwolf tried to use his ax to defeat Superman, but Superman broke the ax. Steppenwolf was a little scared. Superman said "It's time that you learn not to mess with truth, justice, and the american way." Superman threw Steppenwolf across the room. Steppenwolf knew that he would lose to Superman so he went back to his planet.

Steppenwolf told Darkseid what happened. Darkseid was very mad at his uncle. Darkseid "I used to think you were a weak fool and you managed to prove me right."

Steppenwolf said "Well it seems like I didn't disappoint you then." Darkseid facepalmed.

Meanwhile the Justice League celebrated. Batman said "We all did a good job at saving the world, especially me."

Superman said "It's good to be alive again."

Batman replied "I used to have my doubts about you Superman, but I think you'll be 1 of my best sidekicks." Superman rolled his eyes.

The next night Lex Luthor had a meeting with Deathstroke about how to take over the world. Lex Luhor said "I heard that Superman's back to life so I have the ultimate weapon ready: kryptonite jolly ranchers. Ha, ha, ha!"


End file.
